Mayory Christmas
by Peter Zelchenko December 11, 2009

(To the tune of "My Favorite Things")

Off, Penny Pritzker! Off, Valerie Jarrett!
Officer Friendly, please throw kids a carrot!
Rich and his friends think their poopies don't stink--
But he's not as cool as his favorites think!

Just when you thought all the privatize-craziness
Wasn't enough, now we have this new LAZ-ness:
Meters are chillin' all over the town...
(But take heart: when we shiver, their profits go down!)

Tear down a landmark for a new ugly building
TIF$ for La$alle $treet means less for the children
Upping the prices for skates at the rink...
Yet he's not as cool as his favorites think!

He spent uncounted millions on junkets and trinkets
So he and his favorites could snag the Olympics
But No Games & Co.'s work didn't suck:
They saved us from seven more years of bad luck

Let's save Walter's buildings from Olympic Village
Let's save the lakefront from more rape and pillage:
When Daley and friends start undoing our clasp
And get ready to gropius -- let's run away, fast!

Time called our Richie the best mayor ever
If you actually lived here, you'd not think him so clever:
Screwing the public by night and by day
(If the media love him so much, let them pay!)

When we're angry
When we're outraged
When we know we've been had
We simply pull out our voter IDs
And then we don't feel so mad!

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